Pages

 

Recent Pages by iceweasel:
Witches, Satanism, and an Exorcism: A Tour Through the Rightwing Psyche Gateway Pundit Doesn't Understand What Words Mean Monday Morning Lockdown Literature Schadenfreude: One Trump Moment--Watch Ted Cruz Issues Statement, Blames the Bitches

Jump to bottom

20 comments

1 theheat  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 8:01:32am

I think someone puts a little pieces of paper with separate facts in a hat - like fortune cookie fortunes - then they get shitfaced drunk, pull them out in no particular order, and reinvent history when they piece them together.

Thankfully, they all know what the Founding Fathers™ really meant when they encounter some dicey places recounting history. And God talks to them, of course.

2 Henchman 25  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 8:17:03am

The stupid, it burns.

3 nines09  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 8:49:47am

This must be some kind of disorder where he/they project and convince themselves that their delusions are true. Or they are liars. Or they are insanely stupid. I'll go with door number.... Then they wonder why we are behind so many other nations in science and math and other endeavors that demand rational thought. The GOP/TPmotto; Tomorrow Is Yesterday All Over Again.

4 Jimmah  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 8:50:38am

Wow- they were able to refute Darwin nearly one hundred years before he even published his theory.

This shows once again the extraordinary foresight the founding fathers had.

5 watching you tiny alien kittens are  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 8:51:39am

"On the Origin of the Species" by Charles Darwin was first published on November 24th 1859. The "founding Fathers" did all their...uhh...founding, between 1771 and 1788 when the Constitution was officially ratified.

So Mr. Barton, your saying that the founding fathers had an opinion on something they had never heard of and that would not be promulgated as a scientific theory until 70 years later? Ok then, right, your obviously a freaking nutter and a lier...

re: #2 SteelPH

The stupid, it burns.

Indeed!

6 shutdown  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:17:15am

The position taken by Barton is squarely within the four corners of that part of the Wingnut-o-sphere which claims that the founders were gifted with divine inspiration. Dominionism, the sanctity of the Constitution as a "divinely" inspired document - it is all part of a whole, a coherent (if crazy) world view which imbues the US with a manifest destiny, etc. etc.

7 Lidane  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:20:49am

re: #3 nines09

This must be some kind of disorder where he/they project and convince themselves that their delusions are true. Or they are liars. Or they are insanely stupid. I'll go with door number... Then they wonder why we are behind so many other nations in science and math and other endeavors that demand rational thought. The GOP/TPmotto; Tomorrow Is Yesterday All Over Again.

It would be fine if these were his own private delusions. The problem is this asshole is influencing the Texas State Board of Education and their textbook standards. This is the kind of garbage they want your kids and grandkids to learn and believe as fact.

8 Mostly sane, most of the time.  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:31:52am

The FF weren't in lockstep on religion, politics, or anything other than they wanted England to stop doing what it was doing.

Study up on them. They were, you know, individuals.

9 calochortus  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:32:11am

re: #6 imp_62

The position taken by Barton is squarely within the four corners of that part of the Wingnut-o-sphere which claims that the founders were gifted with divine inspiration. Dominionism, the sanctity of the Constitution as a "divinely" inspired document - it is all part of a whole, a coherent (if crazy) world view which imbues the US with a manifest destiny, etc. etc.

You beat me to it. It should be obvious that God spoke to the founders-if they could have opinions on net neutrality, they can surely have opinions on evolution.

10 calochortus  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:33:11am

re: #8 EmmmieG

The FF weren't in lockstep on religion, politics, or anything other than they wanted England to stop doing what it was doing.

Study up on them. They were, you know, individuals.

Heck, the authors of the Constitution were arguing about what it meant shortly after they wrote it.

11 Lidane  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:40:41am

re: #8 EmmmieG

They were, you know, individuals.

Which is the biggest problem for Barton and the other assholes who agree with him.

The Founders are supposed to be a divinely inspired monolith that put this country on a God-centered, Christian path of American Exceptionalism. We can't have them as individuals or as people who might not have the same views on religion or politics that the Dominionist types do. It upsets the narrative.

12 Bulworth  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:49:13am
the Christian television program Celebration on the Daystar Television Network with host Jodi Lamb

These "Christian" networks and their ubiquitous television programming, despite the "fact" that "Christians" can't share their faith in Murica becuz of all the political correctness and how persecuted they all are...

Where were we? Oh, yes, these so-called Christian cable teevee networks have two basic types of programming: one being political, the likes of which invites the David Barton's of the underworld on to miseducate the faithful and the second being "fundraising" (and to be honest, this is about 80% of the programming) in which the faithful are told to pony up the bucks, to "sow a seed" as they say, and by so doing not only make themselves--the givers--rich, because God will shower "favor" on them, can also help the network "spread the gospel".

It's all truly a work of art and flimflam.

13 Bulworth  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 9:51:32am
Revolution was fought to end slavery

Not African-American slavery, surely. The revolutionaries didn't much like it when the Redcoats offered freedom to slaves who took up the British cause against their masters.

14 shutdown  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 10:11:34am

re: #13 Bulworth

Not African-American slavery, surely. The revolutionaries didn't much like it when the Redcoats offered freedom to slaves who took up the British cause against their masters.

You're going to hell. Illegal immigrant hell, no less.

15 shutdown  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 10:14:00am

I don't think Barton meant this literally. He meant it illiterally.

16 theheat  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 10:15:58am

re: #12 Bulworth

And the drives to send money to selected children in [some overpopulated, undereducated, underfed country] so they can share letters from the [formerly underfed, undereducated] child, now with a belly full of food (apparently, the neighbor kids, family, and parents sit around watching the one sponsored child eat?) and writing letters to their benefactors about Jesus, how often they pray, their favorite Bible passages, etc.

I've seen a bunch of these letters pimped by various phony ultra fundie orgs, and it's downright creepy.

I call these recipients prayer pets, or prayer dolls. You don't get glowing letters about Jesus by adopting pets from a shelter. Not to mention, most shelters require you spay or neuter your new pet.

17 Bulworth  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 10:23:43am

re: #16 theheat

And the drives to send money to selected children in [some overpopulated, undereducated, underfed country] so they can share letters from the [formerly underfed, undereducated] child, now with a belly full of food (apparently, the neighbor kids, family, and parents sit around watching the one sponsored child eat?) and writing letters to their benefactors about Jesus, how often they pray, their favorite Bible passages, etc.

I've seen a bunch of these letters pimped by various phony ultra fundie orgs, and it's downright creepy.

I call these recipients prayer pets, or prayer dolls. You don't get glowing letters about Jesus by adopting pets from a shelter. Not to mention, most shelters require you spay or neuter your new pet.

And I'm really sure if I sent money for such a cause that it would actually go to the child, or any child, in question.

18 The Gender Ambiguity of a Flea  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 11:36:09am

Revisionism is appropriation of the past to just one's present actions and beliefs. Barton is trying to re-define America's foundations--the documents, the men, the philosophy--to align it with his (and his audience's) worldview. Barton readers can to claim to be "authentically American"--and most importantly, more American than anyone who disagrees with them--in their values and politics. This sells, both intellectually and as a product because it takes away cognitive dissonance: Barton lets you be a Dominionist yet feeling justified in directly contradicting the Constitution as written.

Read up on Ariosophy and Armanism. It's more esoteric, but the revisionist elements work the same. Richard Barton is Guido von List.

19 theheat  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 1:22:46pm

re: #17 Bulworth

And I'm really sure if I sent money for such a cause that it would actually go to the child, or any child, in question.

Why do you think you only see one kid out of a family of eight being fed?

The one who writes the best stuff about Jesus for the sheep back home sending the money apparently gets to eat the mostest.

20 HappyWarrior  Thu, Jun 9, 2011 7:20:43pm

So, Mike Huckabee, this is the man you think we should listen to at gunpoint huh. Something tells me that if you asked him who Charles Darwin was, you'd get a combination of Karl Marx, Adolf Hitler, and whoever rolled up in to one. Seriously, this man should not be influencing education anywhere whether it be a public or private school.


This page has been archived.
Comments are closed.

Jump to top

Create a PageThis is the LGF Pages posting bookmarklet. To use it, drag this button to your browser's bookmark bar, and title it 'LGF Pages' (or whatever you like). Then browse to a site you want to post, select some text on the page to use for a quote, click the bookmarklet, and the Pages posting window will appear with the title, text, and any embedded video or audio files already filled in, ready to go.
Or... you can just click this button to open the Pages posting window right away.
Last updated: 2023-04-04 11:11 am PDT LGF User's Guide RSS Feeds

Help support Little Green Footballs!

Subscribe now for ad-free access!Register and sign in to a free LGF account before subscribing, and your ad-free access will be automatically enabled.

Donate with
PayPal Cash.app
Recent PagesClick to refresh